It’s been a weird 6 months, I appear to have been in mega ‘declutter your life’ mode. You would have thought that giving birth to little dimples, and curly headed boy going to primary school would have been enough really, plus getting really sick. But I appear to have been on a mission.
Maybe it’s because now I have two kids, there really isn’t any space for anything that is irrelevant or takes up time/space I can’t afford? Did anyone else find a similar thing happened to them after having a second child?
I’m also much more aware of my age (41), and am having no problem in remembering to eat healthily or take vitamins and minerals that I probably wouldn’t have been reliable about beforehand. I realised that if I’m to see my grandchildren, then some serious work needs to be done to get it into working order. Perhaps it’s a big reality check that happens in your forties?
Or is it because it’s my ‘saturn return’ in astrological terms or ‘mid-life crisis’ in psychobabble terms? My lovely astrologer (seriously, if you ever wanted to try it, he’s a lovely guy, brilliant value, very good at it and it doesn’t matter where you live) did say that it was hitting me this year.
I’ve found a wonderful woman locally who will take all the stuff you just haven’t managed to get round to selling on ebay and do it for you (if you near St Albans and want her name, feel free to leave a comment below). Although she takes a fee, I reckon that she makes more on the sale anyway, so it’s well worth it. She took a car load, plus sold a bike and a dog kennel that got picked up from our home. Then even better was the discovery of freegle (used to be called freecyle), which is a yahoo group where you can offer ANYTHING for free and within 24hrs it’s gone; FANTASTIC!
We had a flood from the shower, so downstairs is going to be refloored (we have holes in the floor from the dog scratching) and the walls painted in industrial child proof stuff! So the house is getting a make over too.
I even in a fit of madness went from this, to this (plus yesterday I had all the grey dyed out!):
Meanwhile big northern hairy hubby is also at it, with a sudden fitness regime and a success at losing weight that he hasn’t had in 10yrs. I think that we would both admit that our relationship needs a bit of polishing after all these years (21, how scary!), so there is change afoot there too.
The biggest change came as I decided what to do about my work. I found it increasingly hard to work out how things would work with the second baby. Now that I’m just focussing on Mums and am just overseeing my more general therapy business, it was easier, but also I realised that coordinating our schedules was almost impossible. Plus for Mums I really needed to be able to provide incredible value for service for a really affordable price, but without making it pointless me working. I was seriously considering just giving up work. After all, I could be a stay at home mum (SAHM), and in the time I would normally work, I could get fit, look fab, and then when the kids leave school I’ll be about 60, so pretty much ready to retire. There would be a hell of a lot less juggling to do. But there would of course be the downside that I lose my sparkle when I don’t work at all, so I might look better, but I wouldn’t be much fun.
By the way, you might not know what I actually do? I’ve updated by about page and background, just incase you are interested as to where I came from, and what my qualifications are. But basically, I’m not a parenting coach. I call myself a ‘mummy whisperer’, because I’m just here to help the mum to be clear on who they are, become more contented, get more sparkle in their lives, and create a strong family with less conflict and stress. (There’s lots more information on this blog about the ‘fun creation equation‘ and my services, plus on my main site).
Then out of the blue I found my solution! It’s so exciting, I’ve kept quiet about it all summer, because I wanted to show you what it would look like before I mentioned it. I’ve found a way, that I can provide help for Mums ANYWHERE, at ANY TIME of the day, 24×7, ANY DAY of the week, for ANY LENGTH of time. Plus the amount of stuff I’ve put in the package is well worth about £7000, but I can sell it from £379, with the option to pay by paypal/credit card over 3 months, so it is really affordable. Plus, it will be there for the Mums FOREVER, to reuse over and over again, for that one price. Plus, for anyone who can’t afford it initially, I’ve got a FREE INTRODUCTION, and will be adding a £27 product to help people sort out their finances. It’s way better than just 1to1’s because all the information is there to be referred back to at any time, and better than workshops, because no one can slip through the cracks and pretend that they understand. (Please forgive me for the shouting in capitals, but I’ve been keeping quiet about this all summer, so I’m kind of over-excited!!).
‘So what on earth is it?’, I hear you ask (hopefully?!). It’s using a product called **jigsawbox, funnily enough created by another Mum who must have been in the same situation as me. It means that I can put my workbooks or workshops online into packages. When you login, there will be different modules, inside of which will be videos, audios, and text explaining that particular subject. Then to help you learn it properly there are exercises for you to fill out. But the best bit is, when you press [send to coach], I can then add my own feedback, so we can interact online. There will also be the option for free webinars, or to add 15min skype chats or longer 1to1 sessions for some Mums who need more assistance (for example, if there are relationship issues, PND, or past abusive relationships).
Now I haven’t done a video to show you properly yet, but I will do, so keep a look out for it. But in the meantime, you can get a free introduction to this fab system, plus start to have a look at your own identity and how your family is working at the moment, by signing up for free email list (see RHS). I’d love to know what you think, so please do leave comments below.
So how come has all this come about? Well, it might sound a bit tree hugging, but I’m sure there is a vibe of change in the air. I was too late to get involved in *** Josie’s (a well known mummy blogger) writing workshop about change last week, but there seems to be a lot of it about. It’s the jewish new year, and schools always start at this time of the year, so maybe we are all programmed to be thinking about it around now. There are days when it feels exciting, and others when it feels very scary, and almost like I’m grieving for something being over. I cried buckets on the last night of big brother, and when curly headed boy started school, but in a way they were just opportunities for a few tears to do with something deeper. As my mentor says ‘the greatest transformation happens at the border of order and chaos’, i.e. nothing gets changed without some discomfort! So onwards and upwards, one step at a time, is my motto at the moment.
Is life changing for you too, or is it just those of us in the mid-life crisis?
** I am now an affiliate of jigsawbox as well; of course, because I think it is fab, I want to share it with other coaches/therapist/trainers out there. If you decide you like it after hearing from me, feel free to email me for more info, and I’d really appreciate you using my affiliate link. I haven’t found anything else that even matches it a little, it has been going for over a year, so the kinks have been sorted out, and there is tonnes of support.
*** Josie is one of the 3 mummy bloggers who recently went to bangladesh with Save the Children, and have started a Press for Change campaign to push Nick Clegg to commit to making the huge rates of child mortality in third world countries a thing of the past.